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it's official

i don't hate a lot of people...

but i do know this...

i officially hate my landlord.



what to do, what to do...

ok. so i updated my blog...which didn't include any changes to what my blog looks like, one might say...however, i haven't updated my template yet. Betablogger says that it might change my look forever, and while they say it's easier to change things, i want to know that i'll still have my clock, and my site counter, and my 'sloganizer' that puts my name in all kinds of cool statements and questions and 'slogans' as they say...and i'm afraid that once i update my template, i won't have all those fun things that i added myself anymore...what will my blog be without my weird and quirky additions to a completely boring and simple template used by millions of other blogger-lemmings...

do i make the dive? or do i stay with what i know...


this year's "Not My Job" award goes to:


why is change so hard?

so, blogger is offering a new and improved version for blogspot blogs. but i'll admit, i'm a little afraid of changing and 'upgrading' as they say, because i know how to use blogger. since i've had THis blog, i have figured out, on a VERY basic level, how to manuver a few things with HTML, add, get rid of, and change color and format, a bit...i'm afraid that with the new version i'm not going to be able to do it and i'm afraid of this blog that is really my baby changing to something that i won't like. also, the new version offers options that i don't need to use...for example: i can decide who reads my blog by adding people's email addresses. well, i think half of the people who i at least know reads this blog, i don't know their email addresses, and then all of the other random unknowns who read this blog wouldn't have such a privilege (if i may be so bold...) of reading in on this strange and odd little life of mine if i didn't have all of their addresses...which obviously i won't.

what to do...what to do...

though, i'll admit, the curiosity is building and one of these days i'm just gonna break...


once upon a time...

three people spent the weekend together. this is what happened:

1.picked up sis from the airport and got to show her where i've been living for the last 2 months.
2.went to local coffee shop to wait for brother to join us.
3.hung out in the apartment all afternoon trading music and great stories...
4.tried to see how many people can fit into my kitchen

5.went bar hopping all night long...and in between bars and drinks...discussed a deep, life changing issue or two up too early and barely made it to church
7.realized i couldn't find my car/apartment/work keys and started to freak out
8.found keys in the ignition of my car, where i had left them the night before, but b/c i couldn't find my extra key...
9.enjoyed walking ALL over Lincoln Park and eating at Pasta Bowl after a few trips on the "L"
10.said goodbye to it was getting dark, went to get my car/apartment/work keys from my car (after scowering apartment and finding spare key) and realized i needed a jump start cause my battery had died
12.asked guy who lived in building near my car to help...but it didn't help approached by a man riding a bike saying that he was a mechanic and could help us out...
14.started feeling very nervous by homeless man posing as a mechanic as he told my sis not to talk to him b/c she wasn't the owner of the car, he smelled like alcohol and wouldn't leave us alone after we told him we had help on the way and for him to leave us alone.
15.ended up yelling at the man after he continued to come over and ask for money and almost called the cops.
16.called tow truck to try to jump start my car
17.was nervous about letting tow guy take my car to an automotive shop i've never heard of after he kept offering me deals and not charging me what i was supposed to be was i supposed to trust him after mr. homeless mechanic freak?
18.brought key to automotive shop the next day and was relieved to see my car in the parking lot
19.spent day shopping and eating at a great restaurant in the city with sis
20.barely made it to car shop on time to pay for car repairs and get my sis to airport
21.made it to airport and got to spend an extra 45 mins with sis before she left after flight departure time was

over all, a mix of craziness, and fantastic-ness...

just a few weeks til thanksgiving and then christmas so i can see them again:)



if life is the process and not the destination, why is it so hard to live in and enjoy the process and stop trying to find that one thing (or things) that is going assure you that you've reached the destination. the destination is unattainable...


not done yet

no one came to fix my leak monday.

no one came to fix my leak tuesday.

someone came to fix my leak today, but b/c they heard brayson bark, they didn't come in...even though brayson was closed into my bedrooom and wouldn't've bothered them at all. they left a note on my door handle.

i almost blew up the handle when i got the note and called my landlord fuming. of course the guy i talked to on the phone wasn't the guy i talked to on sunday, so he was like "i didn't know about it"...then, because i was almost yelling, he said "hold on a minute and settle down (with a tone of annoyance). i'll tell them the dog is closed up and someone will fix the problem tomorrow". which frankly made me even more mad cause he wouldn't let me finish explaining why i was so mad. because of this, he just thinks i'm a bitch. maybe that's a good thing, but i don't like people thinking i'm a bitch. and i know he probably didn't know about it. i'm still sick of the leak and the drenched towels on the floor and the damp smell and having to lock my dog in my room again tomorrow...stupid landlord.

other than that, i took the train to work today cause work consisted of a Staff Development day at the Hyatt downtown. my coworker met me this morning at my apartment, and then we met up with another coworker on the 'L' and then took a bus to the hotel. i felt so 'city-girl'. and it was nice not to have to drive:) yay for public transportation:):)

time for food...


the leaking sink saga continues

so, a while a go, i had to get my sink fixed.

it didn't work.

yesterday the corner in my kitchen that has been chronically wet since i moved in had enough water to drench the towel i put down so that i wouldn't get my knees wet. (that didn't work very well).

this morning, just before i left for church, i stepped into a puddle in my bathroom. i proceeded to check my kitchen too, and both floors had corners with almost a quarter inch of water. back in the bathroom, i saw water visibly leaking from between the tub, wall and floor, and it was collecting in what is really a dip in the tiling. booo.

so, i called my landlord..pronto. and told him this needs to be fixed. the conversation went over well, the landlord explaining that he'd send someone over tomorrow and have it fixed, as it's "not rocket science". i thought to myself, if it's not rocket science, the guy should've fixed this correctly the FIRST time. but i didn't say it. he also asked "so this is what the guy is going to see tomorrow?" as if i'm making the shit up or something. as if it's my goal in life to bother my landlord every few weeks with stories of an illeged leak. i said, "well, if it stays the way it is now, yes". of course, i came home from church to find an almost dried out bathroom and kitchen floor. probably b/c i hadn't used the water in a while...duh...but i'm worried that the guy's gonna come tomorrow and all the puddles will have dried up again. however, mr. landlord, it doesn't mean that i was imagining the leakage in the first place...for the record. boo...

AND. i almost had a nervous breakdown again last night when i went to my bedroom to crawl in bed and i found 4...count, two, three, four centipedes in my room. it had been a few weeks since i had a massive spider in there, and i really thought i had gotten over the whole thing...the whole, living, breathing, crawling sick and nasty things that have to infest my life and make me miserable. after the spider incident, i slept with the light on for two days...with a pillow case over my head so that it was still dark, and nothing could crawl into my mouth. you may call me crazy, and normally, i would too. but i really have trouble breathing when this happens, and for some reason that helps. so, last night, after an almost crying phone call to my mother at 12:30 in the morning, i vacuumed my room, sprayed along the bottom of every wall with lysol (as i don't have raid), left the light on, called my pooch onto my bed for comfort, covered my face with the extra pillow case and fell asleep. as of this moment, i haven't seen another living creature in my apartment (knock on wood).

as you may be thinking, i've learned techniques on how to deal with phobias...with behavior that has obviously impaired my better judgement and has begun inconveniencing my life. but, i must tell you, if one person even so much as begins to suggest the idea of any form of desensitization, we can no longer be friends...EVER. though, in self analysis, i have noticed that even though i've never enjoyed little bugs, my reaction to them in general has definitely worsened in the last few years. sometimes i think back to the joyous days when one spider didn't make both my breathing and heart rate double. i have done something productive though...when i have persistent thoughts of whatever bug i saw, i intentionally try to change those thoughts to a different visual picture...i don't let myself dwell on them, and it often helps, even just a bit. cognitive behavioral therapy and REBT anyone? uh..yeah. anyway,i just became aware of the fact that i probably just gave away WAY too much info about my crazy self...moving on

ok. so, beyond that, i've finally put up pictures and art work in my place, and my apartment looks actually quite a lot better, much more like a home. even though i'm not quite done yet, it's already much better:)

tonight, i'm headed to hear Faure's Requiem...i'm excited:)


our tax dollars put to good saving my life

so, yesterday, i joined the kids of the neighborhood walking around, though i wasn't dressed up or getting candy from every apartment building doorman or store owner. i walked downtown a bit to buy some shoes...which i've been meaning to buy for the last few days but haven't been able to get there before they closed. i finally made it to the store before it closed, but the shoes i wanted to purchase, unfortunately didn't fit me. their size 9 were tight, and the guy working looked like i was crazy when i told him that i usually fit into an 8.5 or a nine. whatever pal, i'm just pissed i can't buy the shoes.

anyways, i was walking back to my apartment and from down about 6 blocks, i looked ahead and saw that there were lights flashing near to what i thought was the block of my apartment building. as i got closer, i realized that in fact, it was my block and it was on my side of the street. then, even closer still, i had quickened my pace, i saw a fireman come out of my building door. i just about flipped out as my dog was still inside, and who knows what kind of situation had just taken place.

i saw a woman that i've met before with her dog, talking to other firemen, and when she seemed to be done with them, i walked over to ask if everything was ok, and what the hell happened. apparantly, while she was taking a nap, one of the electrical outlets shorted and sparked, which started the wire on fire, and then a mop close to the wire on the floor. luckily, her dog had woken her up and she was able to get out and call 911 after having tried to get the fire out two times. she lives on the 4th floor, and the guy who lives under her had apparantly freaked out when he came home b/c of his dog.

needless to say, a few seconds could have changed everything yesterday. and i don't think i'll see that woman and her dog again...not sure i'd stay. the fire chief said it wasn't her suck for the landlord.