venting to mom for 15 mins just wasn't enough to get over this...

Don't judge...i'm just moody and need to vent some more!...

ok. so. I'm REALLY getting tired of being lied to, being manipulated and taken for an idiot. i understand that nothing comes for free, but seriously, don't tell me about a free estimate and then charge me $60 to 'clean and update'. And you know he won't agree to even look at it without cleaning it first, b/c 'without cleaning and updating, he won't be able to figure out what's wrong with it'. Don't be all nice and lure me there and then piss me off. The thing is, if nothing else, he'll still make $60 bucks on me. Even as i'm standing there filling out my name and number, i know that i've been took and i should just walk out. but i can't do it, and plus, probably everyone in the whole city will tell me exactly the same thing. it's just really infuriating. i don't like being lied to. i dont like being 'lured in'. if you want something say it, if you don't then say so. Don't string me along with lies. (all this over trying to get my sewing machine fixed so i can make a damn blanket)

also, can you ever call anywhere just for information??? without having to give your name and number so they can hound you until you get what you were just asking about in the first place? i called Bally Total Fitness last night, to find out starting prices, hours, parking, JUST INFORMATION, because i've been feeling like a blimp and it's too damn cold outside to exercise. he says, 'yes, i can help you with that, can i get your name?' so i dodge the question and say 'i just want to know the hours', and he gets a little snotty and goes 'is it OK if i get your name so i can talk to you about the great options we have to offer you?' so i give him my name. part of giving the information to me includes 'when can i schedule you in so you can come and have a trial workout and i can show you the equipment, can you come tonight?' i'm like...NO...I JUST WANT TO KNOW THE TIME YOU"RE OPEN. so i said, 'i can't tonight, maybe tomorrow'. i called this evening to cancel. but he almost got me to go and just try it, he even called me this morning to confirm our appointment tonight. But when he called again this afternoon to confirm, a.g.a.i.n, i knew i had to get out of this, i knew if i went he'd hound me about signing a contract and probably sign my life away...GEEZ...(he then called again after the cancelled visit to find out if everything was ok)

and i wonder why i have trust issues!! haha. No one ever says what they really mean. it's all about manipulation. everyone's trying to screw you over.

ok, so i know that's not entirely true...but sometimes it feels like it...
i will switch to the opposite side...and tell about one guy in particular has shown me that people really are good at heart, even if he's the only one in this whole city, and i don't even know his name...he didn't try to get anything from me, he did nothing but help...let me explain.

last week thursday, when i took my day off, i decided to spend the afternoon walking around the city and then once downtown, i's donate blood. i haven't given blood since college, but there's a blood bank right by my house and i've always wanted to donate again. after the first time i donated i was turned down b/c i had low iron. anyways, i was 'ok-ed' for donating last thursday, told to drink some juice, and about 10 minutes later i was done. I sat for another 20 minutes, ate some oreo's and took my time getting up. they took a pint of blood in a short amount of time. i don't ever remember feeling tired or weird after i gave blood, i just remember a HUGE bruise at the injection site. So, i decided to head home when i started to feel pretty normal. i walked to the bus stop, fine. i sat down on the bench waiting for the bus, fine. i stood on the bus cause it was way too full and i couldn't tell granny to get out of her seat to let me sit down, fine. or not fine. i started to feel lightheaded but figured i'd make it home. then i started feeling really hot and more lightheaded and i took my scarves and gloves off. i realized i should've gotten off the bus at the last stop, and started to bend over, hoping that i could stop from feeling so damn lightheaded. i poked the nice guy in front of me to tell him i needed to get out and then....what felt like 5 hours later (but must have only been a few seconds) i started waking up and trying to orient myself. i had somehow twisted around and was sitting on my feet, one piece of my head phones in my ear, so i had a dream like feeling with music in the background. i started hearing 'is she ok?' and 'what happened?' and "seriously, is she ok?" and i realized that they were talking about me and that i had fainted. the nice guy was trying to talk to me and i realized the bus was stopped and he was going to get me off the bus. i thought i'd be ok and grabbed his arm to help me, but things still weren't fine. there was no where to sit once off the bus, and i 'came to' once again crouched on the ground holding onto an unknown pole, while the nice guy came back to me saying he had just gotten a cab for me. He kindly rubbed my shoulder and told me to relax and take my time. However by this time, i realized that the whole bus was staring at me, and waiting for me to be better so they could continue their trip. the bus driver was on the phone telling someone that he had asked if i wanted an ambulance but i had turned down the offer and was waiting to get into the cab. i made it to the cab, apologizing to the nice guy for being a bother, cause even in my semi-conscious state i have issues with someone having to go out of their way to help me. i should have asked his name or something, or thanked him instead of apologizing the whole damn time. anyways, i barely kept from passing out again in the cab, though i was almost home, and the rest of the night was spent on the couch recooperating.

so, i can't say that Everyone in this city is out to screw me over. this guy was very kind and i will never forget him!

ps. for those nurse friends of mine...i have a question. do i have something to be concerned about?? turns out, i don't have a bruise from the straw sized needle they used to take my blood, but i have a shooting pain all the way down my fore-arm when i put pressure anywhere on my arm, like a nerve was pinched/wripped/punctured...??? it also hurts when i stretch a certain way. i called my physician and the nurse said it is somewhat normal because the needle is so big...and that it will take a while to heal. but am i looking at any irreparable damage here? did they ruin my arm for life?? i told the guy when he put the needle in that it hurt an unusual amount and he said that was normal, but something felt weird...????